I Don't Want to Forget

I don't want to forget...

• The way Bret picks his lullaby at night.  I hold each of the kids in the rocking chair and sing a lullaby to them before tucking them into bed (I know, sappy, right?).  Bret has his choice between "Twinkle, Twinkle, Little Star" (which has always been one of his favorite songs) and "Stay Awake" (from Mary Poppins...seems appropriate for him, haha!).  One night, he told me that when he holds up one finger, it means "Stay Awake," and two fingers means "Twinkle, Twinkle."  Now, each night, he holds up either one or two fingers when I ask him which lullaby he wants.  His serious concentration as he relays the "code" to me is pretty hilarious!

All ready for bed!

• The night before we were going to go to Bay Beach with my Mom, the kids were obviously very excited.  As Serena was saying good night to Jordan, he tried to guilt trip her with the "poor me, I'm going to be working so hard while you're playing at Bay Beach" line.  Serena looked very sympathetic as she said, "No, Daddy, we will be working hard, too!  We will be working hard at playing."  I think he didn't feel so badly then.  ;)

Love this one!

• Cody is taking after his sister in his verbal development (she was a really late talker).  He has a few words that he says fairly clearly, and several more that I think only I can understand.  Most of his other "words" come out as "Nnnnnnnnn" with intonations that show he is trying to make it sound like the way other people talk.  He is fine with "Yes" and "No" type questions; but I love his response if you ask him an open-ended question.  He says, "Ahhhh...." like he's trying to think of the words.  If you didn't know that he didn't know how to talk, you might think he really just didn't know what to say, the way he kind of rolls his eyes around.  It's pretty funny!  The kid could seriously be a mime!  He has this ability to create very exaggerated expressions to help get his point across.  If he wants me to be surprised or to laugh or something like that, he'll mirror the look on his face to help me along.  If he's about to do something crazy, his expression is a cross between "You should be really worried right now" and "I'm getting an adrenaline rush just thinking about doing this."  I wish there was a way to capture these on camera, but he just starts grinning and saying "Cheeeeeeeeezzzz" as soon as I get it out.  ;P

Cody loves to sit and "read" books like Serena

• Bret's bedtime chart.  So, this past late spring/early summer, Bret created a new habit of calling me into his room over and over again after he'd been put to bed.  It was the classic bedtime-stalling routine..."I need a drink."  "Is it morning yet?"  "Is it almost morning yet?"  "Would you cover me up?"  "I need to go potty."  "Now I need to go poopy."  "I guess it was just gas."  etc., etc., and so forth.  I'm not even really sure how it got started, but it suddenly escalated to the point where he'd start calling me in within two minutes of my leaving the room.  To make it even more annoying (and yes, it was really annoying!), he wouldn't just call me in, he would cry and wail (the most fabricated and dramatic cry), "Mommy!  Wwaaaaahhhhh!!!!  MomMMMMYYYYYYYY!!!!"  And we tried everything to get him to quit.  Ev.  Er.  EE.  THING.  For weeks.  Because consistency is key.  So, we'd try one tactic and do it consistently for a week or two, and then finally admit defeat and try something else.  It was ridiculous.  The kid was undeterred.  I was getting really, really discouraged.  Our evenings had been hi-jacked by a monster who usually would not quit until at least 9:30.  After being put to bed at 7:30.  Yeah.  Then he'd wake up throughout the night, too (though he would always go right back to sleep for me, thankfully).  And to make matters worse, his behavior during the day was suffering as well.  (Which was understandable, since he was losing so much sleep and going through so much stress at night.)  He was disobedient, and naughty, and cried easily.  It was a very frustrating time with our Bretster-boy!  Then, one day, Jordan had a stroke of genius.  Maybe we should have thought of it sooner, but we were too busy trying out all our other ideas, I guess!  Jordan suggested we try a reward system with a chart.  So, I got busy creating a chart for Bret.  There were five prizes, and I made it so he had to go progressively more days before getting each prize.  One of my strategies to combat Bret's compulsive calling was to check on him periodically until he fell asleep.  This had worked well for a while, and then he started calling me in anyway.  So, we implemented that with the chart.  "Mommy will come check on you every so often, and if you need anything or think of something you want to tell Mommy, just wait until I come in to tell me about it.  And if you can go to sleep without calling Mommy in tonight, you can put a sticker on your chart in the morning, and you'll get a PRIZE!!"  He bought it hook, line, and sinker!  I enlisted Serena to help him, and she was very excited too!!  That first night, he did great!  He really did.  I could tell it was hard for him.  He almost made it to sleep, but just as he was about to fall asleep, he called me in.  I waited, and listened, and Serena tried to convince him not to do it; but he wouldn't listen to her.  I went in; I can't remember what he wanted, but he understood that he wasn't going to get the sticker or the prize in the morning.  I was bummed, but glad that he'd obviously made an effort.  The next night he was successful, though, and there was great rejoicing!!!  I think Jordan and I might have even watched a movie.  ;)  The third night, he almost made it again, but called me in just before falling asleep.  The fourth night, he got his sticker.  One more sticker, and he'd have the second prize!  Then, the fifth night and the sixth night, he called me in.  Once again, he would make it most of the evening before finally calling me in, but I was getting worried that maybe the chart wasn't going to work after all.  Then, the next night he got a sticker and a prize!  After that, things went more and more smoothly!  He started racking up the stickers and prizes.  The chart took about 3 weeks to complete, but by the end, he was a changed boy.  He was happier, more obedient, he ate better, had fewer night-wakings, he was kinder and more patient, not nearly as prone to crying/meltdowns.  He even had a growth spurt and I passed a few of his clothes down to Cody!  It was crazy!  Jordan and I were both amazed at the change that came over him when the stress of bedtime was taken out, and he got the sleep that he needed!  When the chart was finished, he was very proud.  For the next week or so, he continued to put stickers on it; but it wasn't as important, and he started forgetting.  So we took the chart down, and he's been sleeping chart-less for a couple months now and doing awesome.  In fact, he now insists that I not "check on" him anymore.  I do still come in to check on him now and then (don't tell!), especially if it seems to be taking him a long time to fall asleep.  He's always really happy to see me, and then says, "You're here to check on Cody, right?"  Of course, Bret.  I'm checking on Cody.  ;)

The Chart

• It's always so funny to me to see what the kids come up with to do with their days.  The geek in me thinks it would be really fascinating to study children's play, but I guess I'll just fold laundry and muse on what fills my own three munchkins' days.  ;)  They went through a phase earlier this summer where they were so busy making traps in the backyard to catch birds/toads/worms/field mice.  They have so much faith that some duck is going to be flying overhead and see the nest they made at the top of their slide and decide it is the perfect place to lay eggs and raise a brood.  Or that a mouse will find the little hollow under the slide and birth three baby mice, one for each of the kids, and be so thankful when she realizes that she does not need to care for her babies alone, but has three loving children to help her in that endeavor.  They'll work so hard on a project for 2 or 3 days, and then suddenly be distracted by some new idea.  And it never seems to occur to them to be disappointed that they never did catch anything in their carefully constructed trap.  In fact, they'll probably even de-construct the trap to use it in whatever their new venture is.  They are so incredibly busy and confident in their play, their imaginations just running rampant, and their little hearts just full of faith.  I love it!

Dressing up is often a part of their day.  I love seeing what they decide to wear!  It reminds me so much of what my sisters and I used to do, and we were certain we looked just like grown-ups!  Haha!

• Our little Peat and Re-peat.  Cody tries so hard to copy everything the older two do or say.  Especially Bret.  Though Serena loves Cody and mothers him and anticipates his every need, Cody definitely prefers "Beh" (Bret) over "'Na" (Serena).  (Thankfully, Serena has not yet figured that out!  I think she would be heartbroken!)  When Bret is telling me a story, Cody will come stand right next to him, and then look Bret up and down before attempting to mirror his stance exactly.  After getting himself positioned just right, Cody will start trying to repeat everything Bret says with the exact same intonation, but more exaggerated facial expressions.  Since Cody can't say all the words, he'll just concentrate on getting the last word out.  For example, if Bret says, "I ran really fast!"  Cody's version will sound something like, "Nnnnnnnnnnn...fasss!"  Cody also tries to copy Bret's physical feats, which is a comedy routine that I would probably pay to see.  Cody's pudgy, uncoordinated efforts to do all the jumping, climbing, flipping, somersaulting, and spinning that Bret does are absolutely hilarious!

Cody's belly!  Hahahaha!

• How the kids make such a big production out of packing to go on trips.  Of course, it's all orchestrated by Serena, and the boys get carried along with her enthusiasm.  Bret's backpack is huge for him.  He could seriously probably crawl inside and we could zip it up.  Of course, it is so big because he is such a big boy, and not because he is little!!  (Lest anyone should wonder if that were the case.)  When the kids were packing for our last trip to Iowa, Bret came downstairs with a full backpack and was absolutely bursting with pride and happiness as he announced, "Mom!  I even got the piano in!"  (He was referring to the Little Tykes always-out-of-tune piano.  It somehow disappeared from his backpack during naptime.  Hmmmm....)  A little while later, he was so excited that his backpack was "really good at breaking" when he found a front pocket with Velcro closure that he had not noticed before.  I think he considered it his backpack's best feature.  Serena might have even started feeling a little jealous that her backpack was not so good at breaking.

Cody fresh up from a nap.  He has his "stuff"...special blankie, bear, and paci.

• How the kids struggle to understand sleep.  It's like they can't comprehend the passing of time as they sleep.  One morning, Bret woke up at 7:30am needing to go potty.  I took him to the bathroom, and he said conspiratorially, "I'm going to stay up all night in my bed."

Snacktime

• Serena's love of reading has finally extended beyond the Little House on the Prairie books.  In my extensive searches for books at her reading level that have appropriate content for a 4-yr-old, I stumbled across a series called All of a Kind Family.  She has loved them!  She pretended to be Ella and made Bret be Charlotte and Cody Charlie.  She always gives the boys names from the books she's reading...even if they are girl names.  So far, Bret doesn't really mind.  ;)  When she read an abridged version of Little Women, Serena was Beth, Bret was Jo, and Cody was Amy.  Meg was imaginary.  That was the first time that Serena had not pretended to be the Mother or at least the oldest sister of the book characters!  Anyway, towards the end of the All of a Kind Family series, Serena changed Bret's name to "Jules" (Ella's beau).  Then there were a couple of days of pretending a wedding.  Since Serena has not been to a wedding since she was 2, all she knows of weddings are the pictures I've shown her from our wedding and my sisters' weddings, and the descriptions in the Little House books.  In her mind, weddings are basically just feasting and dancing.  She dressed up in her best dress-up dress, and Bret dressed up in his bike helmet, and they went outside to have a dance and to feast on some carrots and peppers they had begged off of me.  I didn't want to disturb their fun, so I took pictures from the window.

The wedding dance

• Bret's helmet.  Bret has always wanted a helmet.  I mean, motorcyclists wear them, so of course Bret wants a helmet!  Being only 3 and already a very advanced bike rider has its disadvantages.  For example, he does not have the maturity to calculate risks or even to keep his attention on what is in front of him when he spots a toad in his peripheral.  So, it seemed wise to get a helmet on his noggin, and with a little encouragement from concerned grandparents, we found one for him.  The first day with the new helmet was hilarious.  He literally did not want to take it off.  He would have taken his nap and eaten supper with it on if I had let him.  He could not wait until we could go for a walk so he could try it out!  After supper, I took the kids for a walk across the bridge, and Bret finally got to ride his bike with his helmet on.  At first, things were going along like normal, and Bret seemed to be enjoying himself.  Then, about halfway across the bridge, I saw Bret (quite a ways ahead of me) execute a (obviously controlled) fall, and touch his head to the bridge.  When that seemed too gentle, he went ahead and knocked his head on the bridge again (a little harder).  It was plain to me that he was "trying out" his new helmet, but I had to wonder what the other pedestrians on the bridge that night were thinking!  Our walk took much longer than usual, as Bret continued to "try out" his helmet periodically throughout the rest of the evening!

This video is from back in June, right before we got Bret a "real" bike; so in this video Bret is riding his balance bike.

• Bret's love for junk mail.  It is ridiculous how much this kid loves getting mail!  I actually sneak out to check the mail when the kids are busy elsewhere or napping so that I don't have to listen to Bret beg, "Is there anything for me????  Please?!?!!" as if I can fabricate mail for him!  In a moment of desperation a couple months ago, I gave him some junk mail and said it was for him.  Now I actually hope for junk mail so I'll have something to give Bret.  He even knows it's junk mail, and still loves it!  When Jordan gets home, Bret will run up to him, waving his "mail" and saying, "Dad!  I got junk mail!  Look, Dad!  Junk mail for me!!"  If he can find a letter "B" on it, it's even better, because "Bret" starts with "B" so of course that mail was meant for him!  It's especially awesome when the junk mail has an extra envelope inside or coupons or a credit card.  The other day, I overheard him "reading" a "card" to himself, "Bret, you're my best friend ever...."  I know, that's kind of pathetic.  But it was funny!  He's so sweet, he's always making mail that he wants to send to "the boy that sends him all that mail."  I don't know what I'm going to do when I run out of the square stickers I've been telling him are stamps!  ;)

• Cody being Bret's baby.  Bret loves to tell people Cody is his baby.  It's pretty comical, since most people aren't sure if Bret is older than Cody until Bret starts talking.  "Cody is my baby.  Yeah, he's my baby brudder.  And I take care of him, cause he's my baby and someone has to take care of him."  I'm not sure what Bret thinks I do.  He does do a pretty good job being a big brother (most of the time).  "Oh, you need help with that, Cody?  Here, I can help you."  It's pretty sweet to listen to!  No wonder Cody idolizes him!  The other day, Cody was doing something he shouldn't and Serena started bossing him.  This is something we've been working on...Serena letting me be the Mommy.  ;)  I told her to let me take care of it because Cody is my baby.  Suddenly, Bret, who had been quietly observing this scene unfold, said in an injured tone, "No, Cody is my baby!"

• Bret wanting to look under every rock.  Bret has become obsessed...obsessed...with finding bugs and toads/frogs.  Actually, "obsessed" almost doesn't sound obsessive enough to describe his drive to find little creatures.  Whenever we announce we're going somewhere, he says he's going to look for toads.  For example, "Today we'er going to go to church."  "And I'm going to look for toads!"  (Our church is downtown and completely surrounded by concrete.  There is hardly a shred of grass for blocks.)  "Today we're going to run our errands."  "And I'll look for toads!"  You get the idea.  But, all his searching around has given him a pretty good idea of what sort of habitat will yield certain creatures.  Particularly, that you are almost sure to find something under a rock.  He just can't leave rocks alone now.  He has to pick up.  Every.  Single.  One.  Walking into Walmart the other day, he saw a rock (a broken piece of concrete) up by the building (again, no vegetation anywhere nearby; just concrete).  He started pulling away from my hand, "Mom!  Can I look under that rock?  Mom!  There's a rock over there!  Can I look under it?"  

On the hunt for crickets

• Bret's bathroom trips.  So, yes, the chart was wildly successful.  Much more so than we could have ever anticipated.  Still, Bret has to go to the bathroom every night, usually within a half hour of being tucked in.  Our one bathroom is situated between our two bedrooms, so that we turn left to enter the bathroom from our bedroom, and the kids turn right to enter the bathroom from their room (in other words, the bedrooms are opposite each other and the bathroom is in between).  I'm not sure if that made sense, but try to imagine.  If we turned the opposite direction, we'd be going into the living room.  Now, we have lived in this house for over a year and a half, and Bret was potty trained shortly after moving here.  The bathroom has never moved.  Bret's room has never moved.  Still, I've noticed the strangest thing whenever I take Bret to the bathroom at night.  Ninety-nine percent of the time, he will turn left out of his room.  Towards the living room, rather than the bathroom.  After telling me how badly he needs to go potty.  Hmmmm....  ;)

• Bret, the master of Plan B.  Bret is quite an optimist.  He is happy and he likes to be happy.  So, if you shoot down an idea he has, or tell him some disappointing change of plans or something, he will usually only be cast down for a short time.  Until he comes up with an almost-as-great Plan B.  For example, "No, Bret, you can't take your drum into your bed with you during quiet time."  A disappointed look crosses his face.  I brace for the possible meltdown.  Then, the Master of Plan B comes through, "Oh!  I can just use my pillow for a drum!"  Grrrreeeaaattt.  

Somewhere there is a picture of me that looks very similar to this one.  I know my family will get a kick out of this.  ;)

• Trying on clothes.  This past week, I took inventory of our stored-up clothes for this winter.  It's so weird, but Serena hates trying on clothes.  Shoes and coats are okay, but clothes are not.  So, she complains and carries on, while I just try to get the process over with as quickly as possible.  (She does, however, love to get dressed every day and pick out her outfit and jewelry and hair accessories.  Go figure.)  Anyway, Bret is the complete opposite.  He loves trying on clothes!  He gets all excited over everything and "Does this fit me?" He has a comment for each thing.  I had him try on a black wool pea coat, and he said (with his big grin on his face and his eyes all crinkled up), "Oh!  I look like Frosty the Snowman!"  Then, he tried on a Carhartt coat in a drab brownish-greenish color, and he said, "This is fancy!!!"  I have such a hard time keeping a straight face around him, but he loves to laugh, so he just giggles with me!  Finally, we got on his snowsuit and coat.  He looked like a marshmallow!  But, he said (in all sincerity), "I'm handsome!"

Serena and Bret each singing "Jesus Loves the Little Children"